chang|e one's mind

i wrote a song… in my mind

when in doubt…

with 6 comments

i actually don’t know how to finish that phrase.  often, i don’t know how good i am.  and i don’t mean that in a bragging or prideful sense.  i actually don’t know how good i am.  when people say i am musically talented, or that they like my singing or i’m a good guitarist, i don’t know how to take it.  i really can’t tell if they are telling the truth or not.  and i know people will say they’re telling the truth, but it’s hard when you don’t think you’re as good as people say you are.  it’s like no matter how much people say one thing, it doesn’t even matter how many people are saying it; you won’t believe it just because you don’t believe it.

so what’s to be done here?  what happens when you doubt?  are you just supposed to go by what other people say regardless of what you think?  or do you keep striving to be better so that you can actually perform like you think other people perceive you?   or secret third option, do you just give up?  there’s been so many times when i thought about just giving up on music just because i didn’t think i was good enough.  i know i’m totally exposing my insecurity.  but these are thoughts that i have a lot.

when people say i’m good at something, i can’t help but compare myself to other people.  you think i’m good?  better than who?  but then when i find someone better than i am, i immediately think i’m not good at all.  it’s definitely something i just need to get over.  there will always be someone better than i am.  i just gotta get used to it.  i can’t be the best at everything, no matter how much i try to be.  i’ll always be disappointed.


Written by enoch

July 30, 2008 at 7:02 pm

Posted in from my mind

6 Responses

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  1. whoa.. talk about pressure. everybody doubts. easy to be said then done, but don’t go overboard, i guess. by going to the extreme opposites: obsessively try to be better or give up. then again, staying stagnant isn’t good either, eh? molla.. what i’m trying to say is that – no doubt. you good.


    July 30, 2008 at 8:26 pm

  2. you are awesomely talented not just coz ur musicobiwon but comin from as a musica critica 2 musician^__^ music confidencee!”i can i can i can!”^___^


    July 30, 2008 at 11:03 pm

  3. i remember having a convo with suk and i said a generic statement like “wow that place is popular” and he was like “Compared to what?” i was like “huh? i’m just making the statement about that place, no comparison.” When I say a band/singer/etc. is good, i’m not comparing them to anyone else. you can’t compare. everyone is different (except for pop music, it’s all the same there). I know when we say good things about your music, it’s not in comparison with anyone else. It’s just in awe of your God-given talent.

    NOW. having said all that… ENOCH!!! Dashboard + Panic at the Disco + Plain White T’s are coming to Fairfax on OCTOBER 31st!! asdfi’msoexcited!!! ahhhhhhh


    July 31, 2008 at 1:02 pm

  4. I thought it was funny….


    August 1, 2008 at 6:40 am

  5. if it’s anything like me, i have difficulties taking compliments or encouragements from other people. i always feel like i could have done better, should have done better, or that i didn’t try hard enough… but you know, in the end, i figure that if i just try my best, and i still have God by my side, then it shouldn’t turn out bad, right? whatever the ending result may be. also, if you doubt too much about something, then you’re not really letting God take over… and you are a great singer and musician… it’s one of the best things i like about you besides your personality and vibe! so don’t give up! 🙂


    August 1, 2008 at 7:34 pm

  6. oh and i like that picture… i can relate to that. sometimes i tell myself that i shouldnt be alone because i can talk myself out of anything thru doubting. leave me alone to my own thoughts, i’m screwed lol


    August 1, 2008 at 7:35 pm

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