chang|e one's mind

i wrote a song… in my mind

still just a kid

with 4 comments

kid-suitsometimes i look at myself in the mirror and i think, “wow, you’re still just a kid.  no matter how grown and mature you think you are, you’re still just a kid.”  most of the time, looking in the mirror wearing a suit triggers this.  i can’t help but think, “you’re not an adult.  you still look  like a kid playing dress up.”  i look at my friends around me and realize how “adult” they look when they dress up.  me?  i feel like a kid.  a fish out of water.  playing with the big kids.  running with the big dogs.  and whatever other euphemisms there are for being out of my league.

i’d like to think it’s not just my “emo-ness” peering out of those moments.  i like to think i just don’t look good in suits.  there’s just something about the suit that makes me not who i am.  out of my element.  a kid in a candy store.  …ok, maybe i took it one too far.  but you know what i mean.

what further perpetuates this idea of me being a kid are the lessons that i am continuing to learn (which is another blog for another day).  i’m still trying to figure out life as a kid would.  somehow i missed all these lessons that kindergarden taught me and am having to relearn them.  now if you’ll excuse me, it’s naptime so i’m gonna grab a juicebox and watch pbs til i fall asleep.

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Written by enoch

April 29, 2009 at 9:33 am

Posted in from my mind

4 Responses

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  1. i feel the same way. especially regarding stuff w/interacting with the opposite sex.

    hg

    April 29, 2009 at 7:27 pm

  2. aren’t we all continually maturing and learning new things?

    HJ

    April 29, 2009 at 10:33 pm

  3. at least you don’t get mistaken for a kid….

    jean

    April 30, 2009 at 8:41 am

  4. I agree with HJ. We are all continually growing and maturing. We are more mature than we think but it’s hard for us to see it in ourselves. I feel like I’m too dressy when I wear the “adult” professional attire… but I think that’s normal. We’re still young so I’m sure when we’re in our 40s, we won’t feel like we’re kids anymore. Haha, I hope.

    hyunjoo82

    May 11, 2009 at 11:27 am


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