chang|e one's mind

i wrote a song… in my mind

Archive for January 2012

nothing to fear

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it’s ok, don’t be afraid.  this isn’t a scary blog topic.

something hit me the other day: fear hits everyone at different times.  i wondered if at any time, the same fear hits everyone.  for instance, i led worship for the first time at a new church in the past couple of months and i was pretty scared.  or call it nervousness if you will, but i find that nervousness is somewhat related to fear (fear of failure, fear of rejection, fear of doing/saying something stupid).  i admitted to the band that i was a little nervous about it being my first time leading worship at the church and they weren’t shocked per se, but i think they might have found it odd.

is there ever a time where someone isn’t going to be nervous when they speak/sing in front of a big group of people?  and if so, are they liars?  i mean, i feel like whoever you are, if you’re about to speak or sing in front of a bunch of people for the first time, you’re probably going to feel some fear to some degree.  it made me think of those tough guys in middle/high school that say they’re not afraid and everyone wonders how they can be so brave.  are they really not afraid or are they lying?  are some people just inherently not afraid of things that the general population is afraid of?

public speaking, for instance.  i love public speaking.  but i still get nervous when i have to speak in front of a group.  i wouldn’t say i’m afraid of speaking, although technically the nervousness means that i am.  hmmm…


Written by enoch

January 16, 2012 at 9:56 am

names to faces

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you ever see that clip from the office where michael scott uses some kind of pneumonic device to learn peoples’ names?  well, here it is.  it’s bad quality, but you’ll understand the gist.

man, michael scott cracks me up so much.

so in the last couple of months, i’ve met what seems like 1,000 people.  that might be an exaggeration, maybe realistically more like 200-300.  that’s not so much an exaggeration.  i have 2 new jobs each with dozens of co-workers i’ve never met, i sang in the passion choir (a 200 member choir and i met maybe 50 of them), i’ve been teaching SAT prep courses at high schools with classes of 15-25 students each, i’m about to start with georgia tech’s asian christian fellowship where i will meet more students, i lead worship with very talented musicians that i’ve been meeting for the first time, and what’s more, my friends have been introducing me to their friends (either new or visiting from out-of-state).

i don’t say this to complain.  i say this so that you’ll give me a break if i forget your name if i’ve met you before.  although i feel like the demographics for my blog are more people that i know pretty well and haven’t forgotten the names of.  sometimes i just make a up a name based on what i think your name should be.  if you look like a chris, i’m going to probably call you chris even though your real name is matt (that’s if i forgot your name, i’m not going to intentionally call you chris when i know your name is matt).  and can i just say one thing i’ve observed?  white people, i’m talking to you.  you all have so many “common” names, it’s really hard to get them all straight.  i mean: matt, steve, chris, nathan, sean, shawn, brad, etc.  at least with koreans, half of our population is david/john and the other half is daniel/james and they’re usually brothers.  with women, same thing: grace or hannah/esther.  you have a pretty good chance of saying the correct name if you just guess.

i say this to be facetious of course.  i’d say i’m pretty good at learning names.  it’s just lately it’s been name overload so it’s been taking me a while.  so if you see me for the first (or second time) and i can’t get your name down, i will need some mercy.  i get this conversation all the time:

me: hey, my name is enoch.  i don’t think we’ve met

anonymous: oh, yeah.  actually we’ve met before.

me: crap. what was your name again?

anonymous: it’s anonymous.  we met at that obscure thing 4 years ago where there was a huge crowd of people and you looked at me for 1 second and i haven’t seen you since and i heard your name from someone.  that’s where we met.

me: …i see

Written by enoch

January 13, 2012 at 11:18 am